Crazy Jess | Dollar Tree Haul | August 2020

Haven’t posted a blog on here or a video on my YouTube channel in 10+ months but I did film a small Dollar Tree Haul video today. Check it out if you are interested and don’t forget to like, comment, and subscribe.

XoXo,

Crazy Jess 😘

Posted a new video on my YouTube channel after like months of inactivity 🤦🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️ cause ya know, #momlife

Check it out…

https://youtu.be/PqRHvlHoMSQ

Where do I even begin? I don’t know. My mind is a constant jumble of mess literally all of the time. I swear becoming a Mom has hindered my ability at being a normal person. I have a lot to say and share and I so want to blog/vlog about all of it but I’m struggling to find time. I have no time for myself as it is let alone time to do things that spark joy for me.

At the same time, I’m cognizant of the fact that by not making time for the things that rejuvenate my soul and foster my creativity I’m going to continue to feel this very unfulfilled angst. It sounds horrible for a wife and mom to say she doesn’t feel fulfillment and by doing so I can sense the judgement that will be thrown my way. But hear me out on this.

Im clearly no expert on life, motherhood and wifey stuff, but what I’m learning though is that if you don’t take care of yourself you can’t take care of everyone else as adequately as you aspire to. It sounds so redundant and cliche to say “you can’t pour from an empty cup” but it’s the most truthful saying I can think of that rings totally true for my current state of life and my mindset.

While you are in the thick of it though (meaning the chaos, demanding schedules, toddler tantrums, lack of sleep and sticky floors) you can’t see this. The urge to do anything but parent/wife/work make you feel like one of those three things are slacking which makes you feel like a failure and like you aren’t living up to the impossible and invisible set of standards that you have set for yourself in your anxiety ridden and sleep deprived mind. So you let things fall to the wayside out of guilt and obligation for all the other roles and responsibilities you have to tackle. The book(s) you want to read, the blog you want to write, the vlog you want to film, the girls trip you soooooo need, the movies you want to watch, the pedicure you so desperately need, the haircut and color that is 12 months over due,

The eyebrow waxing you so clearly need…I could go on for eternity).

The noise in your brain caused by the constant racing thoughts and feelings of inadequacy is freaking exhausting. My brain hurts from the self hatred and I need to give myself some grace. They say this is a season of life though. That it gets easier. That as the kids grow and become more independent you will slowly begin to sleep more and have more time as they don’t need you as much. While you long for that time you slowly despise its arrival because that means your babies are growing up and they aren’t babies anymore and for so long your self identity has been wrapped up in being their Mama Bear.

I’ve been at this mom gig for two years three months and counting and it’s been one amazing, God led, and beautiful experience thus far. But I’d be lying if I said it was easy or that I knew what I was doing or that I had the ability to juggle it all efficiently. My current state of life is chaotic, stressful, overwhelming and beautiful at the same time. I’m struggling to keep my sense of self and my identity as a woman in trying to navigate it all. Please know I’m trying. I ask for your patience, your grace and your support while I try to figure it all out. If I’m slow to return a call/text, didn’t send a thank you note for a gift, haven’t been able to make those plans to get together like we keep saying we will, or set that girls weekend up on the calendar etc I’m not intending to be a bad friend/sister/daughter/neighbor/person and please know I seriously crave the normal human interaction more than you will know as I sooo need it. I’m just currently dealing with a whirlwind of chaos and I don’t know what to do with myself half the time. It’s literally not you. It’s me. Totally me. Send prayers, positive thoughts/vibes and maybe wine? (Kind of kidding about the wine). And I’ll see you in a couple more years…

XOXO 😘

Crazy Jess ❤️

If you are reading this post it means one of two things…either you are a total Starbucks addict like I am…OR you are frugal like I am and would like to indulge in the deliciousness that Starbucks has to offer but you are too cheap, or…”frugal” to do so and you are looking for ways to bring the flavor of Starbucks to your kitchen to not miss out on life.

Either way,  I’m glad you stopped by.  This blog won’t be groundbreaking, it’s pretty much old news at this point, but indulge me if you don’t mind.  Apparently this “Pink Drink” is a thing but I was totally unaware as I’m a coffee person more than a refresher or tea person when I do go to Starbucks so I had no clue…

Recently, as in like literally 6 weeks ago, I gave birth for the first time to a beautiful baby girl.  In doing so I began the magical (somewhat hellish) journey of breastfeeding which I was totally not as prepared for as I thought.  Turns out your milk supply sometimes can be inadequate or inconsistent, who knew.  In spending countless hours researching ways to increase my supply, one of the suggestions I received from numerous people, Mom Groups etc was to try the mysterious Starbuck’s Secret Menu item called the “Pink Drink”.  To be clear, it’s not necessarily the drink itself that has magical boob milk powers.  Turns out coconut (milk, water etc) can have a positive impact on supply so they say.

With this in mind, and out of shear frustration that my baby girl is having way more formula in conjunction with my breast milk than I would like, I went to our local Starbuck’s where I know the barista by name (it’s sad really) and ordered it.  It felt so unnatural and weird to order anything but my usual drink by the way (a grande iced vanilla latte with only 1 pump of vanilla syrup)  Like I didn’t even know if I was saying it right…or if the barista would know what I’m talking about.  Thankfully he knew exactly what it was and the ordering process was pretty seamless.

My thoughts after trying it was that it was amazing.  It is delicious and different.  It is very light and refreshing making it perfect for summer/warm weather.  I felt kind of bad paying $5 a pop for it, especially considering the volume I will be drinking in my quest to see if it will help my milk supply.  So I decided I would figure out a way to make it myself and off to the store I went to buy all the ingredients.

The recipe I used can be found here:

Starbuck’s Pink Drink Recipe

My thoughts:

• It was harder than I thought to find Acai Berry Green Tea – and when I say hard, I mean they didn’t have any at the one grocery store I went to so I just bought something else and was too lazy/busy/didn’t care enough to go to Whole Foods or somewhere else to try to find the exact tea you are supposed to use.  So I substituted and used the Celestial Red Raspberry Zinger tea and it was really tasty.
• It’s not as sweet as the Starbucks original, which is good for me as I like things lightly sweetened/unsweetened anyway.  I used local raw organic honey as my sweetener because that is what we had on hand but Agave would probably be just as good.
• It was pretty easy to make it and the longest part of the process is boiling the water & steeping the tea but you could totally make the tea ahead of time and keep it in the refrigerator and pour as needed I would think?  
• I saved $5, and the planet each time I made one as that is one less cup, straw and lid in the landfill – so you’re welcome for that.  About that $5…well I’ll probably blow that $5 I just saved somewhere else.  Probably on makeup if we are being totally transparent here.
• I wonder if using fresh sliced frozen strawberries in place of the ice cubes would make it taste better so it doesn’t get as watered down?  I may try that next time.  It’s just a thought as I sit here and reflect.

Before you try this at home, please know there are quite a few different variations of the rip off recipes for this drink when you Google it which was a little overwhelming.  I had a hard time narrowing down which recipe I wanted to go with at first but chose the one that seemed the easiest.

The final verdict is that it was just as good as the $5 a pop original and here’s hoping it helps my milk supply (along with the many other things I’m eating/taking/doing to increase my supply in conjunction with this)

Until next time…

XOXO, Crazy Jess